What does the Best Man or Maid of Honour do?
Being asked to be a Best Man or Maid of Honour is a great privilege. You’ll be feeling ecstatic about being asked to support the happy couple on one of the biggest and momentous days of their life. You’ll be supporting the couple in their preparations as well as on their wedding day. But what exactly is expected of you?
What is a Best Man/Maid of Honour?
The Bride/Groom usually selects a close friend or relative who they want to guide and support them throughout the wedding planning, as well as on the day itself. Key duties you may be asked to assist with are organisation of the stag/hen parties, organisation of ushers and the wedding party and to act as a contact on the day to ensure the couple are free to relax and enjoy their day. You will have often met many of the couples family/friends beforehand so you’ll be the ideal person to speak with or to address any issues should they arise.
Will I need to help plan their wedding?
Each wedding is different so you may or may not be involved in the planning process.
Some couples prefer to arrange and plan their own wedding, whilst others like to have a helping hand along the way. You may need to assist with any DIY or craft projects – so be prepared to get creative! One of the biggest duties will be helping with bridal and groom outfits. Couples can often pay for the majority of the outfits worn by the wedding party but sometimes they may ask for a financial contribution. Make sure this is openly discussed in the early stages of planning so there there is no confusion later on.
Pre-wedding celebrations (aka the stag and hen do!)
It’s fair to say that it is likely you will assume responsibility for organising this and to ensure they go without a hitch. We love a contingency plan, so be sure to factor in any rainy weather activities as a back up, just in case of any inclement weather.
First off you’ll need to understand who the Bride/Groom want to invite and you’ll then need to start considering prospective dates and locations. As diaries and locations can often get booked up quickly we recommend giving plenty of notice to those invited as some may need to make arrangements with work, time off and child care.
Other aspects to consider relate to the cost of organising the parties. Be aware that not everybody may be able to afford a weekend away, so you may need to have several ideas prepared to suit most.
Wedding tradition would stipulate that certain members of the wedding party and family should make speeches. But these traditions are being followed less and less these days, with more couples making their own decisions when it comes to who they’d like to make a speech. For instance, the Maid of Honour and Bridesmaid would not usually make a speech but we have seen many weddings with the Bridal Party making a collective speech. Don’t be afraid to break away from tradition.
Always plan your speech! We wouldn’t recommend having nothing prepared as this could lead to your embarrassment and wedding guests not enjoying a speech being made up on the spot. Consider your audience and ensure you have something for all to enjoy. Whilst a speech filled with jokes may appear fun at first, it can quickly become distasteful and guests may not appreciate the humour. Aim for your speech to be no longer than 10 minutes – any longer and you may find guests may get bored!
Looking for something a little different? If you’re feeling brave and are confident enough – sing your speech! Take a look at this video by Tom McFly!
On the day
Make yourself known to venue staff and suppliers so they know who you are. If instructed by the couple to be a main contact, make sure everyone knows to run any problems that arise by you. Finally, go through the wedding contract and day plan to ensure everyone knows what is happening and when. Get yourself prepared in plenty of time to meet and greet wedding guests – then you’re good to go!
Have a wonderful time in helping create the most special day – it’ll be a day you’ll never forget, for the right reasons!